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taking my own anti-advice

Updated: Jan 23, 2020

You know, advice is overrated.

Most advice is given for the same reason homeowners tell you to buy and renters tell you to rent. The goal is not to make someone else’s life better, but rather to assure the advice giver of her own choices.

That's why I like the idea of anti-advice. It's not me saying, "I think you should do this." It's me saying, "Look. I'm just as lost as you are, but here's something that makes me feel like I have my shit together in some form or fashion, sometimes."

But when it comes to doing less, when it comes to prioritizing and setting things aside that take time away from those priorities, I have a really difficult time taking my own anti-advice. However, life is about choice. You can choose what to stress over, what to let go, and what to try to do better. And, sometimes, you have to just throw in the towel.

j.e.wolff is about doing less, loving better, and thriving more. The "doing less" piece is about doing the tough stuff, lightening the load, stressing less, and getting shit done.
So now, I'm taking my own anti-advice in this regard: I'm focusing on doing putting this blog and the accompanying podcast on hiatus. This is rough, because I cherish the connection I have with the handful of you out there who actually read and seem to appreciate these ramblings. But, you know, I never said doing less was easy. It's often not, especially if you're a doer. However, it's empowering and liberating and it ultimately makes you feel at least a little bit better, at least most of the time.
Here's my story:
  • I'm working on a book, and it's already tough to find time to do that.

  • I initially started this j.e.wolff to hold myself accountable to writing on a regular basis. Then, once I had that down, I decided to try to use it to grow some kind of platform for a future book. The problem is that I'm sometimes hard-pressed to spend enough time working on the book itself, let alone trying to build a platform on social media. So, I kind of abandoned the whole platform idea, but continued with the blog...and added a podcast element. Brilliant, right?

  • Oh, I'm taking a 10-week memoir writing class to help me with the book.

  • So, here I am, now stressing about finding time to write this blog, do the podcast, and, you know, write the book, which is the priority. It hit me while walking to work the other day, thinking about how much I wanted to spend more time with family and friends and just enjoy the last days of summer, but that I had to make time to write this blog, do my podcast, do the work for my memoir class, and, you know, work on the book, which is the priority above all else.

Therefore, it's time to let go. It's time to prioritize. It's time to do a little less. Because time is far too precious to stress about projects that are supposed to be fun and motivating and propel you forward...but that end up decreasing your overall quality of life.
It might seem like a small change, but small changes add up, my friends! They do indeed. And when you're wound more tightly like I am, you need to continually step back and determine the stress points in your life and how you can temper them.
All of that said, you know where to find me.
I'll be back with news about this whole book project. Yup, now it's out there, so I have to make it happen.
With that, thanks for stopping by. And keep sharing your stories, because someone wants to hear them.


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